November 22, 2017

What Do You Need To Purge?

 

Every now and then you need to have a life fire sale. Everything and everybody prohibiting your growth and well-being must go!  Similar to spring cleaning, we should evaluate the stuff in our lives, keeping what we need and removing what we don’t.  We need to treat jobs, hobbies, habits, romantic relationships and friendships like old files.  After they have served their purpose they need to be purged, sent away or marked for destruction.  

Do you have any relationships or habits in your life that you need to get rid of?  If you do, but don’t know where to start, here are 5 things to consider purging.  Believe me, once you remove some of these things, you’ll feel lighter and brighter!

  1. Old Exes.  There’s a difference between being cordial, being friends, and being in limbo.  There’s nothing wrong with the first two, but the latter spells deep trouble.  If you clearly have feelings for an old “boo” or whatever you chose to call your ex, it’s best to cut off communication until you establish a clear understanding of where you stand.  And if you are not in agreement of the terms, close that chapter.  There’s nothing worse than waiting for someone to give you another chance.  It’s not mutually platonic therefore, not mutually beneficial or healthy.
  2. Rollercoaster Road Dogs. These are the type of friends that for some reason, they love you one minute and are cold the next.  You normally have a great time with them, but sometimes, they act like they are angry at you, or find a reason to be angry with you.  In actuality they are probably insecure, jealous or paranoid in some sort of way when it comes to you.  Why try to fix them or figure them out ?  A true friend should always be a constant.  Life throws enough curve balls without wondering where you stand with someone who’s supposed to stick to you closer than a brother.
  3. Homies in the ‘hood.  They are rollercoaster road dogs and childhood friends mixed together.  You broke a few rules with them, maybe failed a few assignments or classes.  You played, T-ball, kickball, hide-and-go-seek, duck-duck-goose and red rover with them!  Basically, you were extremely close with this person when you were growing up.  Even though you’ve matured, this person is still trying to take you back to the days when you were acting an @$$.  They do so intentionally and unintentionally. They secretly hate the new you but miss their old friend.  These types of people are the hardest to let go of because you have deep history with them.   At some point you will hit a crossroad with this person and will have to make a decision either way.  The earlier you purge them, the better.
  4. Unhealthy pleasure-seeking habits.  When you do anything in overabundance, it can be dangerous.  Drinking, smoking, and sex are the top three activities that comes to mind when seeking personal pleasure.  These things negatively effect the body and if they consume you, they can be a matter of sickness, disease and death.
  5. Insatiable love for money.  Allowing money to be the primary motivating factor in all you do will make you miserable at some point in your life.  Staying at a job you hate, working with people you hate or committing unethical acts to acquire money will bite  you in the butt sooner or later.  Whether it be stress, depression, poor job performance or ramifications from unethical behavior, the truth will show its head.  Make your living doing something you can be proud of and are happy with.   If you need more education or skills, make the sacrifices needed to obtain it. 

I’ll close with a quote from my role model Stephen Covey who passed away yesterday, “You can’t talk yourself out of problems you behave yourself into.”  This quote always reminds me that I am responsible for the people I allow in my circle and the situations I find myself in.  When it comes to growth and productivity, there can be no grey areas.  Ultimately, the things and people I choose to affiliate with will influence my thinking and thus my actions.  I have quite a few things to purge this year.  How about you?

Until next time,

-KB

 

 

Reading Is Power

I know I’ve been M.I.A. from my blog and I apologize. With track season in motion, I’ve had little down time to write. In fact, I’m posting this blog from my phone, so forgive me for any editorial mistakes now. Charge my head and not my heart!

I have been doing a lot of reading though. I’ve read three books so far this year, and re-read another from last year. Those books are:

  1. Think And Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill,
  2. What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith
  3.  Getting Started As A Freelance Writer by Robert Bly.

The book I reread from last year is titled  Author 101 by Robert Friskman. If you are an aspiring journalist, I recommend reading all of these. They are awesome starting blocks for launching your dreams into reality.

When I read Bly’s book, I learned about the business of freelance and entrepreneurship. From Goldsmith, I learned about the importance of fine tuning your personality. Hill’s book was about transferring dreams into reality, and Friskman’s focus was a detailed extension of Bly’s book, including details on writing style and marketing techniques. All three have given me a new perspective on life as well as my financial future.

I know that inside of some of you there lies a desire to do something different, perhaps to write a book or start a new career. I want to share with you my top 5 takeaways from all four books. I hope they help you as much as they have helped me!

  1. You must have a desire to acquire, belief that you will achieve and a plan to make it happen. If you do not believe in yourself or fail to plan how you are going to get what you want, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of disappointment.
  2.  You must start today. Not tomorrow, not Sunday, not after this, that, or the other. Time doesn’t wait and neither should you! Procrastination is cancerous! Once it forms in one area of your life, it will spread. Procrastination is why you haven’t started exercising, saving, went back to school or finished most of what you have started.
  3. Educate yourself and become a life long learner of your trade. Plan your work and work your plan. Being efficient takes effort, being exceptional requires more. You need both effort and skill. The only way to obtain and maintain success is through acquired skill and skill applied. Avoid becoming complacent, keep up with the trends of your trade. If you can stay a step ahead of them…even better!
  4. Tell yourself and others what you want. In fact, write it down somewhere, read it daily and meditate on it. When you meet new people, introduce yourself as the person you want to become. Tell them you are an aspiring writer, business owner, etc. Ask them to connect you with people who may mentor your or help you pursue your goals. Once you put it in the atmosphere, you will be holding yourself accountable and creating a support system. Your support system should hold you accountable too, which is why it should consist of people who will help you achieve your goals and provide constructive feedback. You will be allowing these people to speak into your life so they need to be intelligent, well informed, and as objective as possible. Fortifying your network with the right people is directly correlated to your success.
  5. Be patient, persistent and persevere. It may take longer than you would like. You may endure setbacks and rejection. You may lose friends, your social life, even a significant other. And if the time comes, you must be willing to pay whatever price it takes to achieve your goals. If your goals are S.M.A.R.T. (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, timely) and the intent of your financial success will benefit others, the sacrifice will be worth it. People will tell you that you can’t or will attempt to deter you. But keep pressing on! No matter what you desire to acquire, you will achieve if you believe. Plan your work and work your plan!

These tidbits are universal for all aspects of life. I’ll close with a scripture that changed my life, because it changed my mentality: “Do not conform to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Change the way you think!

All the best,

-KB

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